Send Some Salami To Your Boy In The Army

New York is a bit of a city made for masochist. The best places in the city are the gritty ones with questionable food ethics and seemingly morose employees. Katz deli is one of these places. You walk into Katz and some disgruntled man slouched onto a stool hands you a ticket with a list of numbers on it and no explanation.  What they are NOT telling you when they hand you this ticket is:

• you hand it to the person who makes your food, and they hand it back to you with the total on it.
• if you lose this ticket, you get charged 50 bucks.
• this “lost ticket fee” was instilled about 10 years ago.

You choose the person you want to make your sandwich, and they chop the meat in front of you, and give you a sample of the fresh meat while you wait. I always try to find the oldest guy because he’s usually the biggest asshole who makes the best sandwich.

Although the sandwiches are a bit pricey (15-17 dollars a pop) I bet you can’t get through half of one without wanting to die a little inside. As a meat eater and a lover of irrelevant history, this is one of my favorite New York establishments.

Heres a few more Katz facts:

• Katz is where they filmed THE scene from When Harry Met Sally
• It was established in 1888
• During World War 2, they used the slogan “send a salami to your boy in the army” and still use it to this day
• Each week, Katz’s serves 5,000 pounds of corned beef, 2,000 pounds of salami and 12,000 hot dogs

 

All photos by Chloe Rice

Spoons And ‘Toons.

As much as I enjoy the tradition of weekend brunches filled with a table of hungover friends looking down shamefully, I more so miss the days of waking up and seeing how long I could possibly stay in bed watching cartoons until my stomach told me I had to get out of my room and into the kitchen for a sugary cereal fix and a glass of artificial strawberry milk.

Nothing brings out the kid in me quite like a Strawberry Quik White Russian.

At what age did that stop becoming the most loved and anticipated part of my Saturday? The question puzzled me for quite sometime before realizing that it didn’t. Turns out that at the age of 25, I still prefer a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch along side an episode of Bobbys World over a 45 minute wait for a 15 dollar omelette at someplace too loud to enjoy that time with my friends.

This is a conclusion I recently came to with the help of Spoons, Toons, and Booze. An free (yet donation friendly) event that, since this summer, has been hosted every Saturday at the Brooklyn Knitting Factory. Remember David the Gnome or The Adventures of Gummi Bears? They do. Spoons, Toons, & Booze satisfies both your current and nostalgic needs by allowing you to get hammered while watching a wide array of retro classic cartoons and enjoy any of the several provided cereals!

(or a mixture of your favorites, since being an adult means no one can limit your sugar intake.)

The above mentioned concoction obviously belonged to this manchild

I happen to decide on documenting my Saturday morning on a D.A.R.E. themed cartoon day. It involved

• Cartoons that were based around anti-drug education
• PSA’s featuring Pee Wee, TMNT, and some questionable songs
• A drug trivia round, to which I helped lead my team to victory!

The paper was apparently recycled from TV Party nights.

Kings of Convenience (music Monday)

Riot on an Empty Street- Kings of Convenience: Know-How: (2004) I typically dislike albums that are powered by acoustic guitars and monotone voices. Playing those albums are like being forced underneath some ‘artists’ depression rain cloud. But something about this is a bit more seductive. The lay out of the songs makes me feel like I should be listening to it someplace bright and warm. Like the beach or the lighting section of a Home Depot

Mr. Bungle (music Monday)

California- Mr. Bungle: Air Conditioned Nightmare: (1999) California was Mr. Bungles last and best album. Its spastic but I find every strange and abrupt cut to be enjoyable. This song specifically is like some type of slightly erie 1960’s surfing song for people with A.D.D.

Television Personalities (music monday)

…And Don’t The Kids Just Love It- Television Personalities: The Angry Silence:(1981) This is an amazing little punk song with some doo-wop in it. This album really satisfies my cravings for both old punk and that type of rock music that was just becoming predominant through out the early 1960s.

Music Mondays: Wire

Pink Flag- Wire: 12XU: (1977) It sounds like every Ramones song ever made, but the right way. Its gritty and fuels emotion. Pink Flag is one of my all time favorite albums because of its diversity. Its an album that obviously inspired a lot of other amazing artist. For instanceMinor Treat went on to do a cover of 12XU. I personally didn’t care for Rollins Band era Henry, but I did enjoy his cover of Wires song Ex Lion Tamer. The Minutemen looked to this album for inspiration in writing short songs.

Music Mondays

Photo by Ye Rin Mok

When I try to discover new music, I try to find someone whose taste I really trust to introduce it to me. I look to that person to hand over their personal favorite song from a great album. The one song can kind of lead you into understanding the album, and in turn, the artist.

Now, I’m not gonna say I have good taste in music by any means. I can’t play a single instrument and seem to be the only person on earth who thinks that Sigur Ros is just horrible. Despite this fact, I’ve decided to make my average ole’ Mondays into Music Mondays.

The day where I pick one of my personal favorite songs off of one of my personal favorite albums. Like this(!):

Reckless Nights and Turkish Twilights- Raymond Scott: (1937) You know that you’ve heard this song before. If you grew up watching Looney Tunes or Ren & Stimpy, its probably ingrained in your memory without your knowledge. Back when Scott composed music, his one of a kind music style was considered ‘experimental’. For me, this album (along side Toonerville Trolley) is one of the most unique jazz records ever made. Every song title fits the image that your mind congers up while listening to it. Raymond Scott was an amazing composer who has influenced pop culture from every outlet.

Hurlin’ Hobbies

I recently watched the HBO documentary Thin. A film that goes along side a great book by documentarian/ photographer Lauren Greenfield. Its about a ton of girls who don’t like food, hate their families, and want to out-sad each other.

It was interesting, but *spoiler alert* none of these girls actually ‘recovered’. As a matter of fact, the one I was routin’ for died.

I guess the moral of the story is to stay true to your convictions. 

Thin, starring Bert McCracken 

Despite the moment of struggle between girl and cupcake, I also enjoyed this movie a little more because I spent a large portions of my teenage years at the house of a friend who lived LITERALLY a house down from the clinic where this was filmed. Anytime I would go on a walk or a drive with a guy friend, they would take an interest to a slender, pretty girl driving by the house and it never failed to make me chuckle to watch their hopeful expressions melt, as the car veered right into the gates of the Renfrew Center.

In other news, the 2010 Zagat Guide came out today and the New York Food and Wine Festival starts tomorrow.

Warp: Not to be associated with shitty mohawks and mud fights

I love Warp! Not the tour, but the label. Well configured scat based music and thought invoking films who’s emulsion is found through its mind expanding violence.

Warp Records is having a birthday party at Terminal 5 in New York, next month!  Battles, !!!, and Prefuse 73, amongst others will be playing!

Chances are that you are semi-familiar with the films and music that Warp is involved with, but have no idea. If this isn’t the case, I’m her to expand your interest for their well thought out entertainment with bright artistic quality.

I’ve compiled a short list of films released with Warp Films, that I happen to enjoy:

yoga for those suffering of hydrocephalus, as shown in Rubber Johnny

Rubber Johnny: The controversial collaborative video using the direction of Chris Cunningham and the music of Aphex Twin. Rubber Johnny shows a wheelchair bound teenager with a hyperactive imagination, locked in a dark basement with his Chihuahua.

Stephen Graham motioning to me for a hug during the movie This Is England

This Is England:  Shane Meadows cinematically alluring story that follows a 12 year old boys introduction to the skinhead culture, and how he is torn and effected by this Jamaican rooted culture as it spans out into a White Nationalist  movement.

Blood. Also can be used if you don’t have a pen handy! Example shown in Dead Mans Shoes

Dead Mans Shoes: A violent movie by Shane Meadows, that is based around an army paratrooper who comes home seeking revenge of the group responsible for tormenting his handicapped younger brother.

could you be any more charming, Stephen Graham?!

Scummy Man: a video I love mainly because it furthers my crush for Stephen Graham and his wise ass, shitty attitude, “crush you with my fist” character along his fat cheeks and beady eyed baby face, of course. The video is alongside the Arctic Monkeys song “When the Sun Goes Down” Its the story of a young prostitute and an abusive clients (swoon) control over her, as people try to lead her into a ‘better life’. The short story begs the question “Is anyone inherently good?”

Fluorescent Adolescent: Another Arctic Monkeys music video directed by Richard Ayoade. I’m a pretty big Ayoade fan. He one point  acted on The Mighty Boosh when it was still a radio based show. The director also acts as the adorably misguided dork Maurice Moss in one of my favorite comedy shows The IT Crowd.

Anyways, The video features Stephen Graham as my beloved wise assed leader with a shitty attitude, “crush you with my fist” character along his fat cheeks and beady eyed baby face….in clown make up. The entire video is revolved around a fight between a group of clowns and a more civilian-like group. As the video progresses you see that the two leaders were at one point friends. There is something extremely amusing and slightly poetic about this videos slow motion fight sequence  in an abandoned district. You expect an obvious ending but just in music video style, something slightly more tragic happens.

They also put out that new Yeah Yeah Yeahs video.  I’m not a huge fan of, musically, but I do love the wolf in it! Probably because reminds me of Booga from Tank Girl

.

A Place For Kids And Junkies

On the 4th of July, all of my potential plans went to shit. Not too surprised. If it involves groups of people gathering to grilling meats on an open fire with the potential of explosives going off, I’m always the forgotten one.

What the fuck ever.

Psh! Mosquitoes, eating overcooked meats in the dark, rowdy people with poor shoe choices being drunk off shitty beer. Its prrrrrobably not my thing.

The issue intercepting my fantasy hatred for this summer activity is that I LOVE BBQs! I can’t resist the smell of openly burning meat and coals!!!!

I started off my failed Independence Day by cleaning my house and talking about my BBQ dilemmas with my very hung over friend, who could relate. This couch bound friend spent her time multi tasking. She went between listening to me and checking her phone after drunkly suggesting for an acquaintance to throw a BBQ so that she could invite herself to it, the night before. A noble attempt, in my eyes.

To escape from the fumes of pitty and Windex, we went for a walk. Had a man with a mouth full of meat in his mouth not been walking out of an open crack of a solid gated lot right off of the Jefferson L stop, we would have walked right passed it.

We poked our little blonde heads in only to see that this was more than your average junk filled lot. This lots ‘junk’ meticulously formed a 9 hole mini golf course, developed by a series of local artists. As if we weren’t sold right there and then,  right by the entrance was A FUCKING BBQ!

$1 for a hot dog, $2 for a burger. Yes. We had found ourselves desperate enough for the joys of BBQing on the 4th of July so much so that we were willing to pay someone to let us join in.

It was well worth it!

The Putting Lot ended up being a hidden gem amongst many converted warehouse with a lack of interesting businesses.

The mini golf course was created and is run on a volunteer basis. The Putting Lot hires volunteers to work 4 hour shifts throughout the summer, to manage the Brooklynites that come to fill the holes at 5 bucks a pop.

Ha. I said “come to fill holes”.

The groups involved in this project have taken the most random assortment of items and turned them into 9 interesting things to watch as a reaction of hitting a ball with a stick. If you couldn’t tell, I’ve never had much of an interest in mini golf. But its hard for me to resist my love for junk art and creative uses for pill bottles, type writers, and fire places.

See The Putting Lots website for more info

All photos taken by Chloe Rice

Thumbs Will Twist. Can You Resist?…Thumb Hang

The Story of Anvil was an amazing documentary that I recently saw.

Recently, Anvil has been touring around playing a show in some of the theaters that are showing the movie, directly after. 

I saw the show last year in the cafe’ of a theater in Brooklyn. Despite not seeing the movie or fully understanding why the history of that band was so interesting, something about the Canadian trio was intriguing enough to feel that to leave before the set had ended would be a disservice. 

I got to see them again the other week, in the pit of the theater where I saw the movie 10 minutes previous to it. The crowd was much larger and excited than they were even just last year. The band played with as much dedication as they ever have. My friend and I banged heads and summoned the gods….in the middle of the theater. It was awesome. 

The individuals that make the band Anvil really understand life to an extent that so many people born with luck, just never will. They play music with the same passion that they always have. They find inspiration off of each other. They hold down real jobs, tour Europe, an go back to their lives full of discouragement for what they love to do from everyone including their friends and family.  

So why do they keep doing it? In hopes that their day will come. That an album of theirs will be recognized for being worth something, the same way Metal on Metal was, way back when. And while they wait for this to happen, they have become content with even the smallest of success’s they encounter and use it to motivate them forward. 

Basically, they don’t take advantage of anything. They love their fans. They love their idols. They love themselves. and they understand that when you aren’t born with luck, and things don’t fall into your lap, that its ok to take baby steps to get to where you want to be. 

Anvil does have a following of fans who really want things to work out for them. Myself included. Because the musics not bad, their heart is in the right place, and the only reason they didn’t really get their full 15 minutes is because they did everything right. Never trying to fuck anyone over, through their entire career.

Glory Holes

Perhaps I’ve been spoiled by growing up around Hungarian women who make a treat called Farsangi fánk, which is what I consider to be the perfect doughnut. Sprinkled with powdered sugar, it is a thin shell of sweet bread that is warm inside and nearly melts in your mouth. Its more than just that circular shaped  sugar bread that looks 10 times better than it tastes, at Dunkin Donuts.

After having started many days with homemade Hungarian doughnuts, Daily Donuts, California Donuts, and the next level treats from Voo Doo Doughnuts, I refuse to eat anything less.

This may be why I’ve spent nearly every morning this week stopping off at The Doughnut Plant.

The damn place is an adorably retro looking space filled mainly with racks and contraptions that i imagine could only be necessary for making doughnuts. It is in a corner of a strip of sad looking shops, and a photography shop that conveniently also repairs shoes. Its across the street from a housing project. If that scares you away from it, then good. You don’t deserve to indulge in a vanilla glazed doughnut, or a strawberry glaze made with real berries, or a square jelly doughnut dipped in a peanut butter melted sugar coating creating what is essentially a Peanut Butter & Jelly doughnut.

• A big bonus: their decent coffee.

• A slight draw back:the price. I believe the treats are 2.75 a hole.

All photos of Doughnut Plants 'nuts were taken by Chloe Rice

Better Off Ted

 

I usually don’t care for television shows. I was so distanced from sitcoms for so long on tour, that when I got back into trying to watch TV, there was shows like Arrested Development and The Office, which took me a while to understand the style of. 

(I still don’t get all the hoopla about The Office) 

I DO however like 30 Rock, and enjoyed Andy Richter Controls the Universe. Better Off Ted reminds me of both of these shows a little. Its crisp and witty. Filled with visual punch lines and cynicaly upbeat characters.

I’m really hoping that this show is a sucessful comedy for ABC, since they tend to do pretty poorly with those…

 

“Money before people. It’s engraved right there in the lobby floor. It just looks more heroic in Latin.” -Veronica